It could have been worse

I don't really like my alarm clock. Ok, I hate it with a burning passion that almost reaches epic proportions. Something like "I hate it so... much... it... it... the... it... the... fee... flames... flames... on the side of my face... heaving... breathless... heaving breaths..." Yep, like that.

But at the same time I have a secret love for my alarm clock and may shed a few tears if it ever passes on to alarm clock heaven. See my alarm clock is sometimes mistaken for a tornado siren, it is that LOUD. It is also very small lacking any bells and whistles, because really who is going to wake up to bells and whistles.

The loudness has a purpose, a very important purpose, because much like a cute little cub (notice I didn’t say big momma bear) whenever my eyes close and sleep comes upon me I am in a state of hibernation. It may take me a while to get to that state, but when it happens I am out. Case in point, I use to live within 200 yards of a very busy train track and never once did the obnoxious horn wake me from my slumber. People have also tried to wake me with loud shouting and shaking but alas I remain in my state of REM slumber.

However, there are two things that can drag me from my sleep. 1. The ring of my cell phone and 2. My trusty alarm clock.

So this morning when the sirens that mark an impending funnel cloud shrieked through my small house and shook the very foundation I jolted out of my dream-state and slid the switch to off (we’ve discussed my disdain for the snooze button before). My eyes blinked and I saw the numbers 6:30 clearly (shhh don’t tell my optometrist that I slept in my contacts) and realized that this night of slumber just hadn’t done it for me because I was still tired. Stumbling out of bed I flipped on the overhead light to try and trick my brain into thinking it was daytime and therefore my body should be waking up much quicker. Light = Awake in my head.

Now my morning routine is very succinct because I really do enjoy sleeping (or better sleeping in) so there is no dawdling and every minute counts. So I shuffled to the bathroom to start the process and noticed something odd. My travel clock that rests on my sink was displaying a troubling sight. Those numbers read 5:30. Curious I turned to look back at my alarm clock and confirmed that it said 6:30. Now this presented a problem to my mind, the numbers didn’t match. That sounds pretty obvious now at 10:00 am but at 5/6:30 in the morning thinking takes just a bit longer to occur. My first reaction was deep and abiding joy because I might actually get another hour of sleep, but there was also a slight hint of fear that my travel clock was wrong and this was all a sick joke.

So I traipsed into the living room to confirm on that clock the actual time. And the sleep fairies rejoiced with me as I saw that it was indeed 5:30. After the celebration ended and I realized that I could return to the confines of the covers I questioned the blasted alarm clock for waking me a whole hour early. Had I set the alarm incorrectly? Was this some cruel joke planned by my alarm clock? Then I realized that I had in fact reset the time on my alarm clock and played the cruel joke on myself. A few pushes of the button later and I was back to my blissful sleep for a surprise hour of additional sleeping.

I was a little frustrated that I had those few moments of awakeness to interrupt my slumber but I guess it could have been worse. I could have set the time ahead an hour and woken up at 7:30 by accident. That would have resulted in a very different story.